Ah-Choose Moment – That awkward moment after someone sneezes, and are forced to choose on blessing them right away or waiting to see if they follow with another sneeze, so you can cover both with one blessing.
Balonely – What your baloney feels like stuffed all alone between two slices of bread.
Bilplidge – Building seepage. The little drops of moisture that drip from apartment air conditioners high above the sidewalk.
Carnivault – Suicide by ferris wheel (or jumping from any other high amusement ride).
Clork – A shopper who is always being mistaken for the store help.
Doomp – Hot toilet seat sweat.
Entropynis – Erectile dysfunction in physicists.
Fizztipation – The dreaded half-second anxiety that sets in upon twisting the cap off a soda bottle. You hear it fizz, but don’t know if it will explode all over you.
Fleem – Peeling the protective film off a new iPhone.
Gnomad – A tiny old man who moves about from place to place.
Groink – To have sex like a pig.
Heincallnicity – When one accidently butt-dials someone they wanted to talk to anyway.
Heirorist – 1. A woman who inherits the wealth of a terrorist. 2. A woman who inherits wealth, then becomes a terrorist (e.g. Patty Hearst)
Manurepreneur – Someone who invests a great deal of money in bullshit.
Minniquin – A mannequin of a little person.
Ploomp – The sound bird turd makes when it hits your windshield.
Premature Ejokeulation – When you give away the punchline before the joke has ended.
Rekeylecting – The strange phenomenon where one only remembers a password by entering it manually, and not by memory.
Scroaping – Washing the soap before using it.
Scrodge – The seam that runs down the middle of a man’s testicles.
Testicuticled – On the receiving end of a sharp, painful fingernail(s) to the balls during a blowjob – either accidently or on-purpose.
Yex – That exact moment in time when you are 100% certain you are hooking up for the night.
Zzzlomba – Sleep drool.